Diary Of A Happy Doc

Wellness, happiness, great life, fabulous career :)

Becoming a better me

Hi all!!

Sorry I haven’t been able to post in a few days, I’m in Seattle for the national ACEP conference. Going to some great lectures, learning a ton of really important stuff, meeting some incredible people, and i’ll also be giving a quickie lecture in the New Speakers Forum tomorrow!!! YIKES!!! But so excited and so blessed to be in this amazing place in my life.
So there has been a lot of focus about wellness in what I’ve been seeing here- very important topic for us! We all want to have long successful happy lives and careers right??
I’ve learned that you really have to find what makes you happy in your career, what is rewarding about it- what makes you tick…
And you know what makes me tick!? THIS kind of a thing! Lecturing, furthering my education in emergency medicine- meeting inspiring brilliant dynamic people who push you to make more of what you do- do the best for yourself and for your patients… I have been so inspired in the last few days, there are so many things/ideas/practices that I want to bring back with me… I feel like I might forget something if I’m not fervently scribbling it all down!!! (I have so many pages of notes and inspiring quotes already- yes total nerd alert!! I embrace it 🙂
I love what I do. And it takes work to always CONTINUE loving what we do, whatever that may be. For me, these conferences, these amazing people, these incredible experiences help me to stay in love with emergency medicine- and will help me to be the best doc I can be for my patients.

I wanted to include a few quotes from today’s lectures that lit a fire under me and sparked my eagerness to inspire others:

“A lit candle loses no brightness by lighting another”

Amal Mattu: “Leadership: Seek out and foster the strengths in others”

Amal Mattu: “Be a problem SOLVER, not a problem identifier-they’re a dime a dozen. Cynicism is poison.”

Amal Mattu: “Be someone that others want to follow, and follow with their hearts”

Amal Mattu: “Leadership is about nothing more than making other people’s lives better.”

I hope you all have a beautiful day.


30 years and 364 days…

Hi lovelies.

So i turn… (gulp)… 31… at midnight!! Every year around the time of my birthday I take a look back at everything that has happened in my life up to this time.  Look where I am now… 30 years and 364 days old 😉

I gotta tell you, the stigma attached to turning “THIRTY” was so present for me last year, I was focused on thinking of how old it sounded to be out of my “twenties”… this year is actually a lot less dramatic.   AND I feel younger, more vibrant, more ALIVE than ever!  So many wonderful things have happened for me in these (almost) 31 years. I have found who I am, I have discovered my voice and my confidence, I have an amazing career, and I have amazing friends, family, and the 2 most incredible children in the world.  Any question as to why I am so happy??? Who wouldn’t be with all of this! And I couldn’t be more thankful for these blessings every day.  I don’t know how I deserve all of this.

So 31… can you top these last 30 years??? I challenge you 🙂 Bring it. 🙂




Dealing with the hard stuff…

Hey guys!

So obviously this blog encompasses all things health and wellness, but another main focus clearly is career longevity in EM, and “wellness” in that sense…  such as keys and tools that will help us to have long successful careers.  It’s well known that Emergency Medicine has one of the highest burnout rates of all specialties.

That being said, one of the reasons that emergency medicine can occasionally be such a tough field is because of the difficult and sad things we see, feel, and experience with our patients.  Which prompts me to ask, what is the best way to try to handle these tough types of cases!??

Recently, there was a very young child that died in our emergency department while I was working.  This was not my patient, however when a really sick baby comes in, it’s almost like watching a horrible car accident- you just can’t look away.  Or at least I can’t.  I was walking through the resuscitation bay, and I saw a crowd of what seemed like a million people, and I knew something was going on.  So I peeked my head in, and I saw this little baby, only a few months old, with several people attempting to “bring her back to life”, and a whole lot of people standing around the stretcher watching, trying to do whatever they could to help.  Then I saw the mother… she was sitting in a chair near the bed that her daughter was on, terrified, horrified, and holding on with everything she had to the chance that the docs would bring her baby back to her.  I stood there near the back of the group of people resuscitating this beautiful little child- and I kept looking back to the baby, the team working on her, and then the mother… back and forth, over and over again… When the mother was told that her child had died, I was just overwhelmed with sadness, emptiness, helplessness.  I walked quickly out of the bay with tears in my eyes, trying to hide this from my colleagues.  I was not the only one.

I have 2 absolutely incredible little children, and I can’t imagine a pain greater in this world than losing one of them, and as much as we are told to separate ourselves from this kind of thing, I just couldn’t. And I don’t think most people can. Nor do I really think that I want to.  I don’t want to become cold and callous to the point where I don’t feel anything anymore, where I lose compassion and empathy because it’s just “another patient”, or “part of this job”.  True, it is part of this job, and maybe feeling nothing when sad things happen would make it easier to deal… but I don’t think that is an option for many of us in this field.

So for those of us who do have some trouble dealing with these very sad, very real situations, what is the best way to handle this!!? It’s a very big reality of our daily lives on this job.  On that day, thank goodness I had some absolutely fantastic people- friends, FAMILY, at my job, that gave me a hug, a smile, a few words… whatever it was, that helped me get past it.  We helped each other.  We are all in this together.  Because if I wasn’t able to get past it, how would I continue to take care of other people, and give them all of me as their doctor?

Part of what we deal with on an almost daily basis in our jobs is death and sadness.  You have to have a way to deal with these emotionally traumatic events.  What is so important for me, like I said above, is to have a strong core of people around you for support, people with whom you can express your sadness, your thoughts, what you’re experiencing and feeling.  It doesn’t make you less of a doc/nurse/health care PERSON to be a human being, and to feel hurt along with your patients.  In fact, for many, I think it makes us a BETTER health care worker, to be perfectly honest with you.

However, on the other end of this spectrum, if you are at the point where you break down every time something horrible happens, and it is weighing on your life, and you are not COPING with these difficult situations in a healthy way, it will start to wear on you, emotionally and physically, and will quickly lead to burnout.

Try to make sure you have good support, close friends around who can listen to you.  Don’t hold it in, talk about how you’re feeling. If you bottle it up, it is like a poison that will destroy you from the inside.  I know when I went home that night I spoke to my husband about it.  I called my mom and talked to her about it. For me, that helped.  Find what works for you.  What we do is an amazing amazing thing, and with anything like this, there will be soaring highs, crashing lows, and a whole lot of stuff in the middle.  Find your way to stay healthy through it all.



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Be Happy!!!

Hi loves!

So a perfect stranger came up to me while I was walking through target (and humming of course lol) and stopped me and said “I hope you dont mind, but I have to tell you it’s so nice to see someone that is just… Happy. Made my day”…
and she walked away! Didnt know me. Obviously didnt know anything going on in my head… In my life… but she was right 🙂
Smile guys… It really is contagious. And even if you’re not really feeling it, just smiling kinda makes you feel better 🙂 have a good one. 😉


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Show your pink!! :)

Hi everyone!!

Hope you’re all doing well- I’ve been so busy!!! Just wanted to remind everyone to get out and support Breast cancer awareness!!! I did!! Got a pretty pink hair extension at Teeze Salon in Lyndhurst- only $10!!! So no excuses 🙂

And in case you were wondering yes, I’m feeling fabulous, eating clean- haven’t relapsed on soda or sugar 😉 and chewing is just the most amazing thing in the world after liquids only for a full week!!! 🙂 OMG soooo overlooked 🙂

Have a beautiful day my friends!! More to come soon! I will be going to ACEP in Seattle next week, I’m a member of the Wellness Section and hope to bring back lots of good info for everyone 🙂



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Rehash!! And the wrap up!

Hi everyone!!

So I haven’t been able to blog in a few days- For anyone following, I’m sorry! It’s been soo insanely busy the last couple of days, but yes the Juicing carried on!! And I was able to stick it out really without any problem!!

I tried a few different recipes, but the most consistent was my “Positively Pink”!  This is truly the best tasting one I’ve ever tried!! You can see my post “Hallelujah” for the ingredients, but it is delicious!! And it’s not just from me, my kids love it, my husband likes it, and a few of my work friends tried it and said it was great too!!  So this juice is likely going to be a daily thing for me.

So I have decided to be done with the fast!  It was an amazing experience, it challenged me more than most things, it showed me that I’m a hell of a lot more determined than I thought I was, it taught me restraint and it really was kind of a “reboot” for my system!  Incredible all in all, and I’m extremely glad I’ve done it. I have lost a total of 9lbs in the last 6 days (as of this morning).  Guaranteed a lot of water weight, and was just an added benefit to all of the other things I gained through this experience.  I think in this time, I was able to kick some of my addiction to processed foods, to bad sugars, and I’ve learned to really ENJOY the taste of healthy foods!  Someone told me (and I have to look this up to confirm) that the cells on your tastebuds turn over every 3-4 days.  So SUPPOSEDLY if you start eating healthy foods (only!!) after 3-4 days you will be “used” to those kind of foods and flavors, and will be looking forward to them, and can get away from the processed garbage.  My initial plan was to do the fast for 10 days.  I am ending it at this point, not because it was so difficult… (but don’t get me wrong, in the beginning it was HORRIBLE)… by the end I wasn’t feeling hungry, I wasn’t craving junk, I was just done. I feel like I had gotten what I needed out of the experience, I established within myself a new desire to eat mainly clean healthy foods, and there was no real benefit in my mind to going 10 days as opposed to 7.  So I decided to stop the fast. I also was a little concerned I wasn’t getting enough calories and I didn’t want my metabolism to start to slow, so that when I decided to stop the fast, I would quickly gain the weight back.

What’s ahead…now that the fast is over?  I am truly inspired to eat more healthy.  I feel awesome!! And hopefully to finally make this change a permanent one! After what I went through in this last week, there is no way in hell I am just going to start eating terribly! And now I feel my body craving more healthy things!  I am planning to go mostly raw (ha. ha. ha. )- i want about 90% of what I consume to be raw, natural, unprocessed fruits and vegetables.  I will be adding beans, legumes, quinoa and lean proteins like chicken and fish as my protein sources.  I’m going to try to avoid dairy and gluten as much as possible.  I do not want to consume ANY soda or processed sugars!! All of that is badness badness badness!!! Stay AWAY!!

I will keep updating with my process on this healthy journey… I love the way I even feel at this point 🙂  Would I recommend you guys do it? Yes! Do it for the experience… do it to detoxify, do it to make a change in your life! It doesn’t have to be a full 7 or 10 days… you can do it to kick off a new way of living!  It’s truly a wonderful thing.

I wish you all the best 🙂



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Day 4!!! Feeling Amazing :)

Good morning!!

Unfortunately I haven’t gone to bed yet! But I wanted to share.  I am feeling AAAAAmazing!  Down 6.5 lbs, which I know is mostly water weight, but is absolutely an added benefit of this cleanse! Im experimenting more with juices and flavors and I feel better than ever!  And hunger pangs are almost completely gone, if there are all.

Remember we were talking about high’s and low’s with this fast?? Im on some serious high and its carried through since yesterday- maybe I hit my point of peace with this whole fast.  I am happy, never bloated, really not hungry anymore, and feeling extremely positive and clear.  And this is after a night shift!

I’m learning so much about myself already in the last 3.5 days.  I’m learning about my own strength and resilience, I’m regaining confidence in my ability to commit to something and stick to it, and I’m feeling clear and honestly more alive! Amazing. I will be the first one to admit that if I heard someone say that after starving for 3 days, I would think they are certifiably nuts. But this is wonderful.  I am so thankful for this experience and this challenge.

Anyway, onto the juice!  So I came home after a busy night shift followed by a meeting and was almost too tired to even have any interest in making anything- looked quickly in the fridge to see if anything inspired me… saw a few oranges and some grapes, and was like, “why not???”

And here is is ladies and gents!! Breakfast of champions!!


“Orange you Grapeful” will be the name of this citrusy drink 🙂

2 oranges

red and green grapes, about 3-4 cups

Juice and enjoy!

Not feeling so creative as I haven’t slept in about 20 hours, so I’m going to stop trying and just pass out!

Hope you all have a beautiful morning 😀



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Hallelujah!!!!!! :D:D:D

Here we go with the ups and downs of this crazy insane experiment… but I am on an UP and I am going to fly with it!!!

I woke up from my slumber… trudged downstairs to the kitchen and hopelessly looked into the fridge at the large quantities of fruits and vegetables that I had bought over the last few days, feeling seriously depressed, hungry, and defeated.  I was trying to figure out how I would quit this juicing thing without disappointing a bunch of people who’ve wanted to see how it goes and how I get through it!  Then an idea came to me… 🙂

Today, dear friends, I have created the MOST DELICIOUS juice I have ever had!! No lie. It is the first thing I have actually ENJOYED putting in my mouth in the last few days… (stop it!)  It tastes so good that I chugged it…  as if it was… DUM DA DUMMMMM…. DIET PEPSI!!!

If you are trying to juice and every single thing you make is either “I can probably get this down for a day” or “ugh… if I hold my nose, maybe I can gulp it fast enough to get the whole thing down, then dont breathe for like 30 seconds till the taste is gone”… then this is your salvation.

I honestly am almost moved to tears. Enjoyment… in a juice??? One I actually look forward to sipping on??? Last night I was committed to starvation and ketosis, trying to figure out how I can do this without dying in the next 7 days (but then humbly remembering I probably have enough stored to ACTUALLY physically starve for much longer than that).  Thank you Juice gods for bringing me this beautiful beautiful liquid concoction.

I will call her “Positively Pink”.  This has restored my hope in life.  🙂 She actually is more of a brownish color but almost all the fruits that went into her were red or pink… This drink has literally restored my hope that I might be able to do this.  Why brown? Because I added spinach, Green plus red = brown. (5th grade art class anyone?? who knew you’d get this lesson here too!!) 🙂

I know most of you reading this are like- “ok how many times is this girl going to swear herself to death and then the next day wake up fine…” right? Well I did promise ups and downs… so roll with me loves, roll with me.  When or if you choose to do this to yourself, you, I have no doubt, will experience these same swings!!! But the ups are so fun!!

“Positively Pink”



Grapes (I used green but you can do either)

Pomegranate Seeds


Spinach (I used a LOT of spinach and you really cant taste it)

positively pink

Juice and Voila!!

This to me tastes better than anything I’ve ever gotten at a Jamba Juice, actually WAYYY better than anything I’ve even tried to make, although some of the other ones weren’t BAD, I just did not enjoy them at ALL to the extent that I do this one.

If you are struggling like I was, )and I’m sure you can hear it in my previous post), try this and it will rock your world. Yes, when juicing they do recommend more vegetable juices than fruit, but I also need to have something in my body, and I’ve learned I’d rather starve than dry heave every time i take a sip of something, so at least now I’m getting something in.  Add to that green tea for a break every once in a while sweetened with Truvia.

7 days left!!! Now to get ready for another divine overnight shift in Paterson, NJ.




Day #3… and still going

Hi all!

Just getting home from my night shift last night- thoroughly exhausted.  Need to hit the bed in a minute, but wanted to let you all know that I got through another day of this beastly challenge!!!!

I talked to my friends at work alot last night about this craziness and why I am doing this, (thanks for being my sounding board guys!!!) which wasn’t as easy to remember while I was gagging and choking trying to get down the “vegetable juice” which was significantly worse than it was 10 hours earlier when it was first made!! Ugh!!  I almost had Steph shove an NG tube down my nose to get that down!!!

I’m really having trouble with the texture of  this stuff, and I’m really not drinking enough of it in a day to get sufficient calories in.  (Honestly because while I was sitting there feeling hungry- i would rather have felt that than drink the juice!!!) I mean this fast has an added benefit of weight loss (I’m down 4.5lbs since I started!) but I don’t want to STARVE myself! I’m doing this to improve health, not go into a starvation state!!! What gives???

I have to be doing something wrong.  sigh.  I guess I’ll try some new things today. Will definitely keep you posted with recipes I try!

On a good note, I’m not feeling tired or drained anymore, AND i’m definitely not having any more withdrawal symptoms.  If I was enjoying the taste or texture of these juices it would be great!! Maybe I just haven’t found the right one 😉

On that note, I’m going to get some sleep! Have a beautiful day!



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October is… Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!! Save the Boobies!!

Save the Boobies!!!


Yes, there are things going on in my life outside of Juicing.  As part of wellness, it is sooooo important to find and recognize things that mean something to you, and this month is very important to me.  Breast cancer has touched my family as well as I’m sure many of yours.  If it’s not someone directly in your family, I am sure most of you know someone who has suffered with Breast Cancer, whether they are a survivor or not.  Education is so important… for men AND women… and I personally am making sure that I support the cause to find a cure.  I hope many of you do as well! That’s my little soap box.

There are lots of ways to support this beautiful cause!! I suggest you find one that works for you and do it.  Doing good for others has the added benefit of making you feel golden as well… so why not!?

This is the link to the National Breast Cancer Foundation- in it are links to ways that you can help, and a lot of them are really fun!


Outside of this there are just about 3 million other ways to contribute- google is all you need!

Many salons, including the one I go to- (Teeze Salon in Lyndhurst)- are going to be providing pink single hair extensions in support of Breast Cancer Awareness month… and I will be rocking that in full force within the next week or so as soon as they get them in!

…and to top it all off… today while in ShopRite…. this happened!!


OOOOOhhhh yes, loves!

ShopRite Chic, Grocery Store Couture!!! Hahaha jokes jokes jokes I’m sure… but I did it, and I will be rocking my BCA T-shirt and so will my mom, who has yet to know of this fabulous purchase.

Every little thing helps 🙂



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